The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
In today’s post for movie fans, you will find the hitman’s wife’s bodyguard quotes. If you like to watch movies then you must have seen this movie.
First of all, you have a question. Which of the two parties do you like better? Let us know in the comment box. In this movie, we get some familiar characters who get the familiar people.
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Therapist: And how often do you have this dream?
Michael Bryce: Just once.
Therapist: Oh. Well, that’s not too…
Michael Bryce: A night.
Michael Bryce: Mostly when I’m asleep. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Therapist: Darius Kincaid, is he a relative of yours?
Michael Bryce: God, no! He’s a hitman, wanted for like a gazillion murders around the world.
Even took a bullet for him. Bodyguarding committee, they wouldn’t recognize it. Apparently,
they don’t take kindly to protecting sociopaths. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Therapist: To deal with the future, we sometimes have to deal with the past. Quite often
validation issues stem from a disapproving father.
Michael Bryce: I don’t have validation issues. I have a licensing issue. I am a bodyguard
without a license. That’s like being a belly dancer without a torso.
Therapist: I’m thinking, you need to forget bodyguarding for a while. And find happiness
Michael Bryce: Within what?
Therapist: Within yourself. Happiness is who you are. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Therapist: Well, first things first. I think all the guns and violence are weighing on your soul.
So you need to get away and clear your mind, and then, you can find your future self.
Michael Bryce: Wait, like a cool futuristic bodyguard with superpowers?
Therapist: No. Will you stop? Stop thinking about bodyguarding.
Michael Bryce: No Tuscany. Anything but Tuscany.
Therapist: Okay. Capri then?
Michael Bryce: Capri? Like the pants? ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Therapist: [to Bryce] Just you and your future self finding happiness within, the only two
people that you need to be protecting right now. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
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Michael Bryce: [voice mail] Hello, you’ve reached Michael Bryce. Please leave a message, and
have a triple-A day.
Michael Bryce: [leaving himself a message] Hey there, future Michael. It’s today Michael. I’m
not great at first impressions, I just want to say that I think you’d be proud to know that I
graduated therapy. I’m officially on sabbatical, and to be honest I don’t know why I didn’t do
this sooner. It’s only been twelve hours, but already the world feels more abundant. As if
somehow, it’s been waiting for me to make this change.
Sonia Kincaid: The Mafia took my husband. We have to go get him.
Michael Bryce: No, no, no. I’m not getting involved in this. I’m under strict psychological
orders. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Michael Bryce: Hold on a second. Finally, Darius isn’t haunting my dreams.
Sonia Kincaid: [she slaps Bryce] If you don’t help me, I am going to put my strapon, and I’m
going to f*** your dreams until they wish they were your nightmares.
Sonia Kincaid: We’re trying to have a baby!
Michael Bryce: May God have mercy on our souls ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Sonia Kincaid: We have f***ed so hard, and so tenderly. And in so many different places,
positions, and I just haven’t gotten pregnant. Do you know what I think the problem is?
Michael Bryce: Biology. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Sonia Kincaid: I’m going to be such a good mother.
Michael Bryce: I can’t imagine anyone gooder. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Michael Bryce: [to the weapon dealer] Do you have pepper spray? I’m on sabbatical. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Bobby O’Neill: Listen, I have been in Europe for a month, okay? And the only thing you
people do is watch f***ing soccer. Not one bar carries Sam Adams. So the least you could do is
let me do what we do in Boston, okay? You work with the bad guys to get the worse guys.
Bobby O’Neill: What do they call you?
Bobby O’Neill: A** hole?
Ailso: Ailso. Traditional Scottish name.
Bobby O’Neill: Alright, William Wallace, warm up the chop. We’re going to Italy. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Michael Bryce: He asked for me. He needs me. So we’re going to do this my way. That means,
no killing, no guns, and no blood. Boring, is always best. Understood?
[turns around to see Sonia gone]
Michael Bryce: Of course not. What? ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Michael Bryce: What have you done?
Sonia Kincaid: These f***ers got a little bit too fresh.
Michael Bryce: I specifically said, no killing, no blood, and no guns.
Sonia Kincaid: I am not on sabbatical. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Darius Kincaid: Hang on. What is he doing here?
Michael Bryce: I believe it’s pronounced “thank you”.
Darius Kincaid: For what?
Michael Bryce: For saving your life, again, and again, and again.
Darius Kincaid: I never asked you to save s**t!
Darius Kincaid: Baby! What is the absolute f*** is Michael Bryce doing here?
Sonia Kincaid: You said, “Baby, get me Michael Bryce!”
Darius Kincaid: What?! No! No, no, no, no, no! I said, “Baby I need help. Get anyone but
Sonia Kincaid: What? ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Darius Kincaid: [quietly to Sonia] He is the most annoying m**herf***er on planet earth.
Michael Bryce: Excuse me! I have a twenty-twenty hearing. I can hear you. The dead guys can
hear you! And what do you mean I’m the most annoying m**herf***er on planet earth? How
many times have you nearly got me killed?
Darius Kincaid: Not enough! Come on, baby. Let’s get out of here before he starts the inflight safety demonstration.
Darius Kincaid: Are you using pepper spray?
Michael Bryce: I’m on sabbatical. And trying to find my spiritual me awake.
[Kincaid laughs] ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Michael Bryce: I didn’t have to be here, you know! I had fresh cucumbers on my eyes. I had a
linen rope with an insanely high thread count, it was like sleeping in the cloud!
Darius Kincaid: Namaste m**herf***er.
Bobby O’Neill: The hitman, the bodyguard, and the con woman. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
Michael Bryce: Listen. First off, I’m happy to postpone my sabbatical, if it’s going to keep me
out of jail. But I think, you know, you should really reconsider working with these guys. Because
they are, you know, f***ing crazy.
Bobby O’Neill: Do not f*** this up.
Michael Bryce: Oh, we are definitely going to f*** this up. I mean, look at the two people you
are saddling me with.
Bobby O’Neill: Get your a**es to Portofino.
Michael Bryce: Zero chance of making it out of this room. You may as well hire a brain
Sonia Kincaid: I understand some people get cold feet on their wedding day. But I would have
never thought that you’d get cold d**k on our honeymoon night. ~~~The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard Quotes
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Michael Bryce: Now is a good time to talk about the seat belt rule.
Darius Kincaid: Perhaps now is a good time to talk about the “shut the f*** up” rule.
Michael Bryce: I’m just saying it because she’s driving like a crash test dummy.
Darius Kincaid: Do not criticize my wife’s driving, m**herf***er!
Michael Bryce: You lied to her back there. You weren’t on a job.
Darius Kincaid: And how would you know that?
Michael Bryce: Because, there’s like twenty-two body indications when somebody lies, and
you exhibited forty.
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